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Is it my fault?

Kids abuse tobacco, alcohol, street and prescription drugs for many reasons. It’s much more helpful to identify why you are using them and find help – rather than placing blame on yourself or others.

Remember, you are not alone.

• An estimated 4.6 million kids in the U.S. between 14 and 17 years of age experience the negative consequences of alcohol use, including impaired health, poor school and/or job performance, i even criminal arrest. In fact, alcohol is the number one drug problem among teenagers.
• In 1999, about 14.8 million Americans used illegal street and prescription drugs on a regular basis. About 3.5 million people were addicted to these drugs. An additional 8.2 million were addicted to alcohol.
• In 1999, an estimated 554,932 emergency room visits were related to the use of illegal street drugs, over the counter drugs and prescription drugs.
• At least half of all people arrested for major crimes such as homicide, theft, and assault are using illicit drugs at the time of their arrest.
• Alcoholism and drug abuse is involved in over 50% of spousal abuse, 38% of child abuse, and 80% of cases of domestic violence.
• Cigarette smoking accounts for nearly 500,000 deaths per year in the U.S. alone
• Illicit drug use accounts for approximately 20,000 deaths per year in the U.S.
• Alcohol is responsible for thousands of deaths through auto accidents.
• Alcohol use accounts for 108,000 deaths per year.
• There is a strong relationship between suicide and the heavy use of drugs and alcohol.

How do I cope with my alcoholic or drug-abusing parent?

The first and most important thing to remember regarding the use of alcohol or drugs by a parent is the three C's:

• You didn't cause the problem.
• You cannot control it.
• You cannot cure it.

Your parent's problem is his or her own. You may feel sad or angry about their substance abuse problem – but you should not feel responsible for it. If your life, or the lives of your siblings, is being affected by their problem you need to find help. You cannot cure your parent’s addiction but you can be supportive once he or she decides to stop.

There is a lot of denial in every family experiencing substance abuse (whether it’s your abuse or your parent’s abuse). The family denies that the abuse exists for the protection of all involved. . But talking about the problem openly and honestly is the first step towards solving the problem.

Talk to someone: -- a relative, sibling, your other parent, a friend, a counselor or therapist, a priest, minister, rabbi or spiritual advisor about what you are feeling. Remember, you are not alone and can get help with this.